Talk around female water coolers often centers around how we as women and some of us as moms and wives, are currently pushing back against the desire and often the societal expectation, to be Super Woman, Super Mom or Super Wifie.

so calm and put together....

The conversations take a whole host of shapes; gripes, praises, funny stories, horror stories.  But underneath it all, I think we are all just trying to figure out who we are/how God uniquely created us and how we can successfully live within those boundaries.

For example, take me. I severly stink at several things that woman are “supposed” to be good at. I am not a great gift giver, if I do give you a gift, it’ll probably be late. Why? Because I stressed so much about what that gift will say to you that I couldn’t get it out to you in time. All that time was spent stressing before I gave up and prayed you will like it. Additionally, I stink at any kind of written correspondence. Hand written I mean. Like, involving snail mail. It’s your birthday? You’ll get your card eventually. After I’m done stressing about your gift and what it is saying to you. It isn’t because I don’t love you or didn’t remember.

However, I’m good at other things! I love email and Facebook and obviously blogging. Social media is my friend. It’s how I keep in touch with people I love who live far away from me. I ADORE talking on the phone. I do it way too much. I’d say “my poor children” here, but I already know I’m going to get mine when they become teens. My boys will love the phone and thus, I will be beating girls off with sticks.  (Psssst…I’m scheming to get them to love shopping, but so far, no dice.) Their wives will thank me one day for how well they communicate.

Other things I’m not so great at? Keeping baby records. Sigh. This one stings. I tried my hand at scrapbooking and frankly, it’s just too time consuming. I like doing it, I want to do it, but it is not realistic for my life. As a result I feel UBER guilty about my boys’ babybooks. They are a disaster! I have stuff just crammed in there. There are very few actual photographs in albums (because they are all on our computer) and I’ve done an awful job writing stuff down. I keep hoping I could improve but again, that’s just not something I can be successful at in a traditional and expected way.

So…I found a new way to play within my personality: digital photobooks! My BFs Amy and Crystal both do these in some form or another. One does an annual book each year that she works on all year long and the other does special occasion books for vacations and Christmas, etc. This has been a really fun thing for me to start.

I think it was back in May that I began my 2011 Nevil Family digital scrapbook on Shutterfly. I’m up to May too in my book. But you know what the best part is? Looking back at the pages I’ve finished. I just love seeing my whole year flash before my eyes. I especially love seeing how much fun we are all having in our family moments, successes and even in sad times like death of family members dear to our hearts.

I may stink at a lot of things, but knowing my own limits has helped me to realize that I can do “super” well at other things. I’m pushing back against the Super Woman, Super Mom and Super Wife mentality by investing in what I’m good at already and finding ways around the things I am not so good at right now. That makes me feel super. 😀

How are you pushing back and balancing expectations within your personality?

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2 thoughts on “Know Thyself…

  1. Great post, Tiffany, and great examples of how you are playing to your strengths and “outsourcing” the areas where you’re not as strong. I think I’m learning/trying to embrace the way God made me, rather than repress it to make others comfortable or to fit into the super woman mold. I’m feeler personality, but I’m strong too. I don’t like to scrapbook (what?!), but I’m still a good mom. No use pretending. Thanks for the encouragement!

  2. I think you are a super friend, an amazing communicator and a FABULOUS mom. I learn so much from you. You have so many strengths that are outside of the “norm.” I love that about you. I may or may not have had an emotional breakdown last night and I may or may not have said more than once, “I miss Tiffany.” That’s the kind of friend you are. I’ve never received a birthday card from you (or you from me – I double stink at that) but you have been a dear, dear, loving friend to me. And I love that about you.

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