Hey everybody. I’m so sorry that my blog has been b-o-r-i-n-g, boring lately! I think it’s a personal issue. I know this sounds dumb, (but it will make me feel better) but I haven’t been blogging much because I have nothing fun or funny to tell you. Sorry. Life is certainly happening around here even though you may not know it by my blog.
So it’s not that nothing is happening-a lot is happening…I just don’t know what to say about the things that are happening. (and to our Moms who read this we are fine.) I’m just a bit tongue tied/at a loss for words/don’t know where to start….
In light of my boringness, I updated my header to something happier (because if I can’t have some sunshine at least I can look at pretty pictures) and here’s my “Top 10 Tuesday” list of things going on in my house, my heart, my head and the Army since I don’t know what to say or where to start:
- Jeremy told me last night that February of 2009 they are going to NTIS (or whatever that acronymn is!) in California for 30 days. This is a pre-deployment thing that is done 6-9 months prior; it’s a training/preparedness exercise. What that means is we are looking at August 2009 for a deployment to Iraq (12 months). I don’t know anything else at this juncture. (and you have to say “juncture” like President Bush when you read that ok?…so go ahead…reread it…I’ll wait.)
- My FRG is nuts. I tread delicately here because my FRG girls read this I’m pretty sure (go ahead ADMIT IT!). But we are new to this whole shabang and so far – not the best. For those of you who don’t know that jargon yet, FRG stands for Family Readiness Group and it is the official venue of communication between the Army and the families. FRG’s have a general reputation as being not good-too many hens and such. But my hope was that we would MAKE this one good because everything was new. We are still working on it, but it has a long way to go. It’s a rough road to haul sometimes…and the red tape here is more annoying than the working-at-a-church-red-tape…
- I love making new friends. My Army girls rock even if the FRG doesn’t and that’s all that matters to me. My girls from church and my small group rock too. I think I would be in a yucky place heart, mind and spirit-wise without them. So thanks girls-for the love and for all you have taught me and continue to teach me about friendship. And my girls in St. Louis, …*sigh*, I miss you girls so much. My heart aches for you.
- I’m a little sad lately. I wish that wasn’t the case and I hate admitting it here because blah….but there’s a lot of heart stuff inside me lately. I’m not sure what’s brought it on (could be the book I’m reading), but it’s definitely not good blogging. Good journaling and talking with my spiritual community, but not good blogging. Again, I’m ok. I’m just wrestling with God…forgive my limp.
- One of Jeremy’s buddies moved in with us temporarily. He’s a neat and nice guy. His name is Patrick and he and Jeremy went to basic training together in Georgia. He was on his way to moving out of the barracks and getting a place of his own with a bunch of other guys (and he was staying here in the interim); but he made some bad choices. So now he is moving back into the barracks. Needless to say, it’s been a different house having a guest for 2 weeks. Especially a guest who is struggling with his own remorse over his bad decision(s). He’s moving out in the next couple of days and we are just personally covering him with prayer as he has a lot of stuff going on in his life with the bad decision(s) he made. Sin sure does have a way of getting us into trouble.
- Cooper told me today when I was putting him down for a nap that he is going to talk to people on a stage with a microphone. I asked him what he was going to talk to the people about and he said “Jesus.”
- A lot of people I love are sick-and not just “cough, cough, I have a cold” sick, but life threatening and debilitatingly sick. Andrew has lyme disease, Carter has diabetes, Alisha had her stinkin’ colon removed. There’s cancer and stuff all over the place and it breaks my heart not just to see them sick, but to see the things the families go through emotionally, spiritually and physically due to these illnesses. I know I can’t fix it, I know it’s part of sin and life, I know it’s the way things are – but my heart is saddened by these things and how they touch so many lives-and not just general lives, but lives of people I know and love. All of you are in our prayers and we are amazed and encouraged by your strength.
- At M.O.P.s today, our speaker cancelled so we watched a stand up comdeian, Anita Renfroe. I’ve never heard her before or seen her-but wow! She cracked me up so bad that I could not hold in the laughter. And, I’m sorry I laugh so loud guys. I can’t help it. She was cracking me up so much….I can’t contain it sometimes. It was good to laugh my bootie off though. That link is only mildly funny compared to her other stuff,…in my opinion anyways.
- Cooper has been a booger the last couple of days/weeks. He’s almost 3 (which I hear is a rough age) and he has that last set of back molars coming in-but grrrrrrrrr. As mom’s, (and dad’s as I know some read this too) I’m sure you will relate to me a little when I say that whenever your child starts doing/saying things that are bad/annoying/embarrassing/mortifying, you feel very much that it is a reflection upon yourself as a mom, a parent, a spouse, a woman/man and maybe even a Christian. It’s grinding not because of what is happening, but because of how my own identity is somehow tied up within that action/attitude. I can tell myself I’m a good mom and I certainly am not a mom who struggles with self-confidence. I don’t think I stink as a mom and I’m probably too proud sometimes; I just struggle with looking stupid maybe. I think that is where the desire comes in for us (as moms/women) to be someone or something OUTSIDE of our children. Sometimes I’d just like to shout “I am an autonomous adult and I’m sorry my little person is being an annoying booger right at this moment.” My reaction to my sinful child is sinful and childish…I hate that about me! I know he’ll turn out ok and so will I, it’s just annoying to be so annoyed with yourself….
- September marks 2 years that Jeremy has been in the army. I’m so amazed that we did this. I think I cruise through life these days without a ton of thought; but every once in a while, I am caught by the gravity of the decision we made to come here, to sell our house, to leave everything we know and love. We risked so much. We are still risking so much. Somehow, tied up in all that stuff, my perspective on hope was dashed/thwarted but it’s being renewed ever-so-slowly. I had a day yesterday where I crammed the ENTIRE elephant down my throat of “what-ifs”…the transition back to St. Louis (one day) scares me just as much, if not more!, than the transition into the Army. I got sucked into that “what-if” cyclone of bad things and my sweet honey threw me a line and got that elephant out of my throat. But whoaw…So please pray for us. This has been a rough thing we’ve chosen to do and it wasn’t without cost. We fully recognize that we did it all the while saying that while we knew we’d experience loss, the alternative was more expensive than the risk. Please pray that we keep seeing God’s hand in all this and please pray for our transition. It is a long way off, but it’s scary to me.
So that’s my “Top 10 Tuesday” list. Like I said, I haven’t known what to say or where to start with everything going on right now with us. But, this was helpful to my heart, thanks for listening!